October 31, 2018 at 1:15pm I stood in my workplace bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror and said I am going to start writing.
Well actually I was in the stall and I started to pray to God saying I want to write how I am feeling, what I have been through so that maybe I can relate to others who may be feeling the way I do.
As I am writing my eyes are filling up with tears, I am feeling a knot in throat and a slight headache. I associate these feels as maybe this is the way I should be going.
“Dear heavenly father see me through on the path you have made for me in Jesus name I pray Amen”
As soon as I pray I always feel so much better.
I am Christian, a single mother of 1 boy trying to figure out where I go from here.
Wow…. Am I really doing this as I ask myself. I’ve always had thought to start writing and I always thought I had to have some big amazing idea that I tend to do, but never go through with it. Talk and thoughts can be cheap when coming from me is what I use to say, but I know now what you speak can form who you are.
I love writing in my journals for years and this time I felt let me start my journal with you. Hey, you never know we might be able to learn something from each other.
I currently live in Toronto and I must say I am blessed each day because the good Lord wakes my son and I up every day. I have a job, I have a vehicle, I have a roof over our heads, I have family and friends that love us.
Of recent I am currently feeling like I have hit the bottom, or I am digging myself in a hole in so many ways.
I am at work doing my 8 hours; of which turns into a 10+ working hours a day if I allow myself. Having big dreams and desires that is not allowing the world to see.
“GOD WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO TEACH ME”
Is my question every day….? It is said we shouldn’t question GOD … Wish God would just set beside me and talk to me and comfort me, so I can just cry all my worries away….
Wait he already does that, but I am not taking the time to meet with him and have our private conversations like we use to.
What is my purpose? What is my next move?